My week with Grandma Dora

I've kinda put off writing this post only because I don't know if I can put into words the experience I had during the week leading up to my dear grandmothers death, or if I can write meaningful enough words to describe how much she taught me and how much she means to me, or accurately describe the respect I have for my parents after watching them serve my grandparents endlessly in such a loving and unselfish manner.

We were in Burley just a few weeks ago for Thanksgiving where my grandma was up and chatting with me about my family and how cute the kids are. So when I heard from my parents that on Christmas grandma had been in bed for 3 days straight and was no longer eating we decided to take advantage of our week off from school and head to Burley.

The kids and I stopped in Utah to pick up Sara and her kids, it was a little squishy in the back but the kids were great. We got there Monday afternoon and pretty much my Monday through Friday days blur together but our time was pretty much spent taking turns watching the 6 kids while the other spend a few hours at grandma and grandpa's house. I got to spend countless hours sitting on the side of grandma's bed and occasionally she would open her eyes when I would talk.

I got a chance to tell her how thankful I was that she helped raise me. And thank her for teaching me how to play ping pong in her basement even when I would stand on the table and hit the ball really hard off the ceiling. I told her thank you for picking me up from school and being out there 30 minutes early doing crossword puzzles because she was worried she would be late. I told her thanks for the endless supply of candy. I told her thanks for always leaving out toast and fruit in the morning when I would stay the night. I told her thanks for playing endless games with me and helping me come up with good scrabble words so I would get some points. And I told her thanks for her constant humor.

I got to sit in grandma's quiet house and visit with my Aunt Darla, Aunt Diane, cousin Steve and family, my brothers, my sisters, cousin Mike and family, and others.

Before this week I already had a very high opinion of my parents and their goodness, but my respect and admiration for them grew 10 fold. My parents had been spending their nights at my grandparents house for awhile because my grandpa has started to get confused at night and ends up wondering the house and even going outside. When we got there Monday, my dad was on his 5th day of zero sleep and he walked back and forth checking on grandma, getting grandpas meals or other needs, contacting people, taking care of bills and other paper work. And on top of all of that my parents were still fulfilling their 40-50 hours a week in the temple; always scheduling someone to look after my grandparents while they were gone.

When Sara and I first went into grandma's room she had a painful look on her face, they had been giving her meds to try and help and they just hadn't kicked in all the way yet. Of course this affected Sara and I but it wasn't till we saw the pain in my dad's eyes as he watched his mother in pain that we lost it.

My mom, also sleep deprived found the optimism and humor in everything. When she talks of her late nights up with grandpa she just says oh I just fall right back asleep, or I got some of my projects done, or she says at least grandpa is entertaining. She's amazing, she can serve my grandparents all day over there come home to 12 grandkids and 4 of her kids and whip out some pork chops, ham, potatoes, etc out of nowhere and with a smile on her face! Or she can spend the day in the temple and come back with tons of Valentines paper for the girls and foam swords for the boys and an idea of what to feed everyone at her house as well as all the guests and grandpa at his house. I only wish I had a little bit more of my mom in me.

My favorite is when she let all of us go to grandmas house Thursday night and she had the 6 kids. After a couple hours dad said we better get you back, I hope mom is doing ok. I walked in with my dad and the house was quiet with just Christmas lights on. I thought for sure they were all in the basement but my dad waved me down the hall. My mom was laying on the bed with all 6 kids in their pjs and they were all pretending to be asleep and being quiet as can be! It was hilarious and found out you don't ever have to ask if mom is doing okay when it comes to her with the grandkids!

Friday morning grandma passed away at 11:35 AM. My dad was on the verge of leaving because he and my mom had a very busy day at the temple ahead and needed to head to Twin. My dad told her some wonderful sweet things and then said he needed to go to the temple and she took her last breath before he could leave. After she passed my sisters and I sat around her on the bed and cried but the feeling of peace and happiness was very present in the room. I will never forget this week I had with Grandma Dora and will never forget her unwavering faith and kindness and her ability to endure to the end.

The kids and I got home on New Years Eve and plan to head back on Thursday before Saturdays funeral.

My grandpa sitting in the room with her before she passed away. They've been married almost 75 years!

My grandpa is moving into Highland Estates assisted living today. As much as my dad hates moving grandpa out of his home he needs somewhere there 24 hours a day and my parents can't keep that up without effecting their own health.